For dudes that were so loud, I feel like a lot of you have gotten really quiet, and I don’t even know where you all went? I feel like a lot of you recently have been feeling a little afraid. It’s not fun, right?
I, and a lot of other people, know exactly how you’re feeling because, well, we have been afraid of you guys for a long time. I personally tried really hard to be a straight white dude. I even fought being authentically myself for like 20 years, but low and behold, I just never could fully play the part. Being ignorant, and mean for no reason didn’t really suit me.
CRAZYYYYY, I know.
You see I can blend in with most of you when I’m just standing around. I’m also a white dude, just not straight, so unless I’m having sex with my partner in public, I assume most of the time I can blend somewhat in. I mean, I’m pretty gay after all, but you get the point.
What I’m trying to say is, why you tripping boo?
I’m not saying all of you are afraid of your masculinity being challenged by, well, basically anyone that isn’t a straight white dude. It’s not like it’s a super delicate flower or anything, but it feels like you’re kind of worried a lot about everyone else’s personal lives.
Like why do you care so much that someone might be Muslim, that a dude might want to marry another dude, or that women want to have the rights to make decisions for their own bodies?
Do you think you should always have the right away, and be privileged based upon nothing specific?
Again, I’m not trying to say you’re feeling weird, but it feels like you feel weird.
Did you once have a weird thought about another guy? Does that woman wearing a hijab confuse you because you’ve never seen one? Do you think you’re entitled to do whatever you want with your boner because no one told you that no means no?
Look, I get it, you basically have been told you’re better than everyone else for your whole life, so when a black guy, a muslim girl, or a gay dude comes around you feel uncomfortable. Different is scary at first, and the fact that you’re so worried about everyone else’s lives would make you think we are really worried about yours, but we’re not.
We don’t want to take away your rights, the same way you’ve tried to suppress or taken away ours. We don’t want to convert your kids, we just want to make sure they’re educated, open-minded, and overall nice human beings. We want this planet that we all live on to be protected so you can also live here safely, and we think clean water is more important than making some rich white straight republican dude even richer.
I promise you money isn’t everything. Especially when you have no planet to live on.
Does this sound dramatic? It does kind of, but this is literally what millions of us around the world are worried about because of you guys.
Don’t get me wrong, I know it wasn’t just you bros, there was also the Trump Twats, the self-loathing blacks, gays, and any other minority that thought voting for Trump was a good idea that voted for him. However, you guys were the biggest turn out, and you guys are the ones that have grown up to now be the leaders of our country, so we kind of need to have a real chat.
Here’s the thing, you might think you’re totally open minded, and only voted for Trump because of one issue, but as you can see, you voted a monster into office because you wanted some reject frat bro to make you feel heard again, not great again because our country was actually thriving.
Again, I know different is scary, but different doesn’t mean bad. Different is how we think beyond the confines of how we’ve always lived, and created amazing technologies, positive and progressive social movements, and made the world a better places for the next generation of kids, which include yours.
I know you’re worried about your guns, your kids, and your really special lives, but your guns aren’t more important than who I can marry. Your kids aren’t any more important than everyone else’s, and your lives are actually being hurt by criminalizing diversity.
I’ve been searching for you since the election because I feared we’d end up here, and now that we have, you’re really hard to find.
Don’t worry you’re not my type, that’s definitely not what this is about, but I would love to sit down and talk. I feel like if you came out of your bubble, and maybe saw what life was like in other parts of the country and world, you’d see how nice us snowflakes really are.
We believe in equality for all, including you, and we think a hit of marijuana, legally of course, would take a lot of the edge off, but let’s be honest, we know you’re secretly smoking the stuff. We think all religions deserve to be practiced, although, personally I feel like they’re just tearing us apart. We believe that love is love, and what one person does in the privacy of their bedroom doesn’t affect anyone else, it’s been proven for years, and men and women are in fact equal. Race is just something that makes us beautifully colorful in a room, when everything is white it’s quite boring, think of like a hospital. Not so welcoming, right?
Anyways, what I’m really trying to say is, wake up! We, the diverse, educated, differing socio-economic, transgender loving, Muslim accepting, black lives matter believing, feminists, eco-friendly, gay friendly human beings of the world need you to join us in protecting our country, and ultimately the world. We want to keep America great, but make it even greater, and as you can see that’s just not happening.
So let’s be friends. Let’s hang out. Let’s talk, let’s do this quickly because time is of the essence, and you need to use your white heteronormative privilege now.
We sincerely appreciate it!
And as always much love!
The new and ever changing faces of diverse America.