What is healthy romantic love? How do we define it? Where does it come from? Why do we fall for specific people, and not for others?
For as long as man has told stories, love has been at the center of everything. From great wars, to epic songs, to movies that stay with us forever. Love is the thing that we all long for at the end of the day when the noise of the world quiets, and we are left meditating within our essence’s essence.
While I may still be figuring out all the facets of love, there have been instances when I’ve felt love for someone else in a way that is indescribable. However, I’m going to try and explain it here, so that we may understand love a little better.
Healthy romantic love is listening to your person talk nonstop about their life, their problems, their hopes, and their dreams without wanting to interject your own answers.
Healthy romantic love is your person finishing, and then asking you the same questions.
Healthy romantic love is feeling comfortable enough to open up to your person in a way that you never thought you could, or would know how to.
Healthy romantic love is having your person open up to you in the same way.
Healthy romantic love is watching your person age physically, and knowing you are only going to be more attracted to them as they age because your attraction goes far beyond skin.
Healthy romantic love is spending an unplanned afternoon together, which turns into the perfect day.
Healthy romantic love is fighting with your person, but knowing wholeheartedly you will get past this because you both want to.
Healthy romantic love doesn’t look at disagreements as fighting, but as a way to approach sensitive topics that have to be dealt with.
Healthy romantic love is watching your person enjoy life, and feeling fuller because they feel full.
Healthy romantic love is showing your person new things.
Healthy romantic love is having your person show you new things.
Healthy romantic love is giving up the last bite of something delicious so that your person can savor it a little longer.
Healthy romantic love is having your person give you the last bite of the meals they have grown to know you love.
Healthy romantic love is understanding that your person may not realize they are your person, so you let them go off into the wild to find whatever it is they are looking for.
Healthy romantic love is knowing they will find their way back to you.
Healthy romantic love is actively communicating when things are both good and bad.
Healthy romantic love is patient, understanding, and kind even when disagreements, tension, and uncomfortableness ensue.
Healthy romantic love is watching your person eat ice cream like they’ve just tasted it for the first time every time, and still finding it incredibly adorable.
Healthy romantic love is knowing that you both need to maintain your friendships, so you alternate hanging out with each other’s friends.
Healthy romantic love is understanding you need time to do things on your own, so sometimes you see your friends alone, go on trips alone, do things alone.
Healthy romantic love is being full of excitement to tell your person about all those things you did alone.
Healthy romantic love is welcoming your person to your friends and family because you want to, not because you are expected to.
Healthy romantic love is being introduced into your person's world because they want to.
Healthy romantic love exercises the body, the mind, and the soul.
Healthy romantic love is knowing your person doesn’t complete you, but makes your world far brighter with them in it.
Healthy romantic love is your person letting you know the feeling is mutual.
Healthy romantic love speaks the truth, so that you both can move upwards, not just forwards.
Healthy romantic love is constantly evolving and growing in a way that works for you and your person, without the boundaries of the rest of the world being worried about.
Healthy romantic love is looking at your person as your partner, not your property.
Healthy romantic love is that feeling when you meet your person, and you know they just met their person as well.
Healthy romantic love knows your person will never be perfect, and you love them even more for it.
Healthy romantic love means your person feels the same way about you.
Healthy romantic love doesn’t involve stressing about when you will see each other because you fundamentally know you both will, and want to.
Healthy romantic love doesn’t play games, take days to return a message, or follows the “rules.”
Healthy romantic love is knowing your person will find other people attractive, but doesn’t let this get the best of you.
Healthy romantic love is your person understanding this goes both ways.
Healthy romantic love involves every single emotion, but always ends with kindness, joy, and peace.
Healthy romantic love is what we all want to and will find at the end of the day because we are taking the steps to work on ourselves right now, so that when this person comes walking into our world, seemingly out of nowhere, we are ready to honor that healthy romantic love.
Remember healthy romantic love is the specific type of love we are looking for, so be specific with your intentions when it comes to finding that kind of love. Remember that you are deserving of an amazing love that shows you parts of yourself you didn’t even know you possessed within your being. Remember healthy romantic love starts within ourselves, and manifests into the world to attract the type of person who will make this healthy romantic love even deeper, fuller, and more beautiful than we can begin to imagine. Remember that healthy romantic love knows no boundaries when it comes to race, religion, sexuality, gender, and a multitude of other things we often get hung up on, so be open to others. You never know, healthy romantic love may be right in front of you right now, but because we’ve gotten hung up on love that wasn’t healthy or romantic, we are often blinded by our egos desire to have something we fundamentally know isn’t good for us.
Ultimately, what healthy romantic love is, is yours to define, so be gracious on your journey, be kind to others, and most importantly spread this kind of love everywhere you go. The more you spread this kind of love, the closer you will be to finding that person, who also spreads this kind of love.
What is something you would add to this list? Let me know in the comment section below. I always love a good love talk.